You Can Quote Me

Here are just a handle of my favorite quotes.... I think they really describe my personality (almost) better than anything I could write.

Life may not always be the party you hoped for, but while you're here you might as well dance.
-Judson Laipply

I believe that life is a little like the ShamWow- prone to occasional suckage but mostly bright.
-Diablo Cody

Green lawns and clean cars and swimming pools are part of the good life, American style.
-Alvin Weinberg

If you say live together die alone to me Jack, I'm gonna punch you in your face.
-Rose, LOST

Take lessons from me girls (those of you whom the law, and modesty, and your code, will permit): be mindful of creeping old age, don't waste precious time- have fun while you can, in your salad days.
-Ovid

Only two types of people wear sunglassses at night, blind people and assholes. And that guy is not blind.
-VH1, but I take credit for it mostly

Hopped up out the bed / Turn my swag on / Took a look in the mirror / Said what's up
-Soulja Boy

And personal favorite phrases:
'Word.'
'Fail.'
'Tool.'
'Awkward.'
'Ugh.'